Wednesday, March 2, 2016

He said I wanna see you again, but I'm stuck in colder weather, maybe tomorrow will be better, can I call you then?

I can't tell if I'm accepting or denying

Maybe some of both

Because I'm pretty fine, I'll laugh at things, enjoy moments, I'm fine. Until I'm not. Once I break, I'm really not fine, thinking about all the things it seems like are going away. Because it's not just you. While obviously that's the big one, it's the weekend nights I spent over there too. Hanging out with every one there. It's giving up on all the things I thought we could do in the upcoming months. Because apparently now baseball games may be too much. 

And ya know, with Sena, at least it was someone I didn't know. But see I was actually starting to really like Miranda and wanted to be friends with her. Like the girl has seen me cry, and that's not something I just do. But I guess you were starting to like her more too. And now I don't know if I'll ever be in a good place with her. It's not like I hate her, I just, idk. It's not her fault and I hate that it has to be this way. But I just can't, at least not now. We will have to see what the future holds I guess. 

But clearly I'm still hurting, no matter how much I try to pretend I'm okay. 

Side note, Colder Weather by Zac Brown Band. If you've ever wondered. Probably my all time favorite song

May is still a couple months away but that's going to be a good month. Finish the semester, go to the North Shore, quite possibly go to a couple Twins games, and then Tree Town. Eventful, fun, full of things I love. I just wish it were sooner, but yet it'll be here soon enough. 

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