:)

so basically today was like the best mood lifter ever. Well the best mood lifter without seeing my boyfriend :P

it started off all bleh since I had to get up early for a Saturday. But it was because I was going shopping with my grandma! And I went into that trip thinking I would just get my shoes for JOBS. I ended up with two pairs of shoes and three bras. Awesome! I ended up getting a different color of shoes for JOBS because they didn't have my size buttt I really like these ones too :)

so then we stuck around at the mall for a while and had lunch and then I met my friend there. We walked around for a little bit and then BAM! We were part of a flashmob. It was super cool and fun and it is awesome to be able to say that I have been in a flashmob!

Then right after that me and Rachel had to quick get over to one of the high schools in town for our choir rehearse with the symphony! And that was actually pretty fun. It felt good to just be singing and be getting ready for our actual concerts tomorrow! And then at the end we kinda had our own mini flashmob because we busted out singing and dancing to our arrangement of deck the halls and that was super duper fun. That is just like our feel good song and everyone is really confident with singing it and it was great. I still say we should do it at school some day :)

so that's about it for today. But yeah it was an amazing day. Definitely one of the best in quite a while :)

stress :P

So I'm not really sure what to say... But I just feel like talking. I dunno I guess the past 24 hours or so have been fairly upsetting. People are upsetting, people are disappointing. And it's too effing cold outside. And it's probably getting to be that time of the month here soon. And I guess this is a super lame post so I can't even decide if I'll even post it. Basically I'm just kinda hangin in there til the weekend. Even though it's already Thursday, the weekend can't come soon enough. I know this weekend I will be busy doing things I love... choir and shopping! So that should be good. Hectic, but good. And I'm kinda nervous for our choir. We are doing several super hard pieces and we are only days away from our concerts and there is a lot of work yet to be done. Somehow, we always end up doing really good so that isn't really a worry for me. But I really am anxious to hurry up and go shopping and get my shoes and not have to worry about that anymore. And I guess I only am that anxious probably because I was supposed to go today but then my grandma's plans changed. Blah. Now I've still gotta call her and figure out exactly when we are going to fit this is. It's just gonna be a stressful several days. Oh well.

hmm :)

Have you ever like sat down and really thought about what other people think of you? Like not in a bad way, you just honestly are curious? Well I do. It just kinda like hmm I wonder what they think. I mean everyone has an idea of how they think of themselves but what do other people see? I mean really? And also there is so many things that people don't know that you know they would probably judge you on. Like for example, I've probably gone farther with a guy than most people would really think. All though who knows. Maybe everyone thinks Imma whore :P And one of those things that pretty much every girl/woman wonders is how pretty people, mostly guys, think you are. Like is that one person that tells you that you are beautiful just being nice and pretty much lying? Or is it something every one sees, but just doesn't comment on. And at least with myself, I catch glances of myself sometimes where I'll just be like woah. I'm pretty. And don't go thinking that I'm one of those girls that thinks they are ugly. Cuz I'm not. I just think I'm average. Just the average pretty-enough face. And as far as my actual body goes, I'm pretty happy with it. I could afford to lose 5 pounds and gain some muscle but I don't really mind. Again, I'm just average. Skinny enough. Well I take that back... most people would probably say that I'm skinny. Not super skinny, but skinny. And I'm short. And honestly, I've grown to love it. It is fun being short. Short is cute. And short means you can wear 5 inch heels for JOBS and not have to worry about being taller than your date(: short also means it is easy for someone to pick you up while hugging you. And now this has really gotten off my original topic :P but like do people think I'm annoying? Cuz I know there are a couple friends of mine that it's like, I love you but gurl you get annoying. And just yeah like my general personality in general. How much of it do they really see? How much do they really know about me? That's another thing. People talk about other people. Everyone does it and that's just how we are as humans. So what do they say about me? Do they even ever have that much to say? And now that is potentially getting a little deep so I'll just not go there :) and of course, what people say about you to your face, and what they actually are thinking about you is going to be different. That's just how it is. I dunno I've never really been that hard on myself and I've never stressed about what people think of me. I'm just curious. I mean yeah, I always do my make up and hair before school but that is as much for myself as it is for other people. Like I want to look good for myself. And part of it is just that that is the normal things for girls to do and for us to feel accepted. And that sounded worse than how I meant it, I promise. And I wonder how my boyfriend sees me. Like I would honestly love to see myself through his eyes. He thinks I am so great. And I mean I am but it would still be nice. Especially to like be in his mind when he sees me. Know how much he checks me out :P I dunno there really isn't that much to wonder about with him. Because he usually tells me. Well this was probably enough for now and this is actually pretty long. I won't bore you anymore :)