Here I stand, just as I am

I don't feel like myself 

June gloom

Some nights I seem to be really positive and some seem to be pretty negative. Like tonight. It's like the one thing I know I want in my future is something I seem to have very little control over and is completely up in the air. I wish I could have what I want. But maybe God is just working in mysterious ways, as per usual. 

You might think I'm crazy, that I'm lost and foolish

Simultaneously scared and excited for the future, both caused by the uncertainty of it. That uncertainty is beautiful in a way but it also leaves a lot of things up in the air. I feel like I'm going to have a great life, I just have no idea where my path is taking me right now. Mainly because I don't even know if I really am on a path or just kind of wandering about.