So lately at my school there have been a lot of pregnancy rumors. Some true, some that we aren't so sure about. But honestly some girls seem to be taking getting pregnant at this age to be a joke. But it's not. Joking about being pregnant and making it seem like you are serious isn't funny. It's not cool to be 16 and pregnant! It's just not! It's nothing to be proud of.
now that I have gotten that rant out of my system, I have to say that the 2 girls that are confirmed as being preggers at least seem to have a good support system going for them. Of course one of them is due next month and one of them is only about 5 weeks along but they still have at least had the sense to get pregnant with a guy that they have been with for a long time. Now of course it is too early to know for sure if they will truly stay around since the pregnancy itself usually is the time they actually do stay. Because that little baby isn't there yet. That little stress causing bundle isn't there yet. However, they baby daddys so far seem to be quite committed. Which is definitely a good thing because if they run away during the pregnancy, there is no way they are coming back. But if they at least stay to see their son/daughter then at least they hopefully have that want to be in their child's life. I mean it is so unfair for a baby to grow up with only a mommy. Especially when the mommy is still growing up herself.
So of course all this got me thinking... it got me thinking about what if that was me? What if I was the 16 year old girl with a baby on the way? It would be horrible. I would cry. I would cry a lot. I mean I am so not ready for that. But there is no way I would have the strength to abort. No way. So that leaves adoption and, of course, keeping it. And as much as I know that I would want the better life for my baby-and myself-and to give it up for adoption... I really don't think I could. I think that as soon as I saw my baby, I would forever be connected to him/her in such a deep way that I just couldn't let her/him go. And I think part of that feeling I get where I know I wouldn't be able to give it up comes from the fact that that baby would be 50% me and 50% my boyfriend. And I don't think I could ever voluntarily give up something that is made up of me and him. But yet keep it would be SO HARD. It would be so stressful and just generally hard and really teen parents don't have much of a track record of staying. A baby would kind of ruin the relationship that I have with my boyfriend and turn it into something else. And I know that that really sounded selfish but I kinda think it is true. We wouldn't even have the time to connect anymore and we would have to take on so much more responsibility. But yet... I know he would stay. And I'm sure every teen mommy to be says that, but I really really mean it! I mean this is definitely something we have talked about and I trust that he would stay. He is the kind of guy that would stay. He wouldn't be able to walk away from our son or daughter... and not away from me. He loves me too much. And he would love our child too. So part of me also says that there is a possibility that it would even make us stronger in a way. We would get through it. We would find a way to get through it together.
We have talked about it and we both are worried of an unexpected pregnancy. I really am worried of getting pregnant. I mean society is programmed to scare us away from sex as much as possible. But ya know what, I don't think that will stop me. And I know that sounds bad but it's true. I'm on birth control and we will use condoms every time. But who even knows when the first time will be. And besides, some couples have to try for months, or even years, of unprotected sex to finally get pregnant. So even unprotected pregnancy does not equal guaranteed pregnancy. So if every once in a while, we get it in, while using 2 forms of birth control, the likelihood of me winding up pregnant is very very slim. And I know that I basically said "it can't happen to me" and teachers and magazines and such are always telling us stories of girls that had said that exact same thing and then BAM. Ended up pregnant. I'm not trying to be stupid, I'm really not, but according to statistics, it won't happen to me. And don't worry. I absolutely promise that we will use a condom each and every time we have sex. But also, we haven't even started having sex and if and when we do, it won't be an often occurrence. It really won't be. We could even attempt to line it up with my non-occuring ovulation cycle. So yes, I get that I am kinda being stupid but please see that I am doing everything right. I am doing everything that a teen can do to make sure she doesn't get pregnant. I'm not going out and having unprotected sex every other night. I'm trying to be smart.
And now I am really sorry for getting on such a long rant. It's just that teen pregnancy is something I have a lot to say about. I'm sure a lot of people, especially my age, do. Hope you enjoyed it though :P
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