There was high school and all the shit I went through then. And then there was Jacob heights and I thought that was really good. Obviously we all had some issues, but overall, I was happy there and with how things were. And now I've been back at home, sharing a room with my sister for 7 months now... And at first it was alright, you and I seemed to be really good and I was able to switch between friend groups on the weekends, which was nice. And then it all changed and now today I woke up and just wasn't happy. Which isn't like me. As much as I'm not a morning person, I embrace the new day and even if I don't wake up smiling, I wake up in a decent mood. But not today, today things are hitting me right in the face. I hate it. I'm sure it'll get better, I usually don't feel shit like this for long, but damn it sucks. I almost feel pathetic for counting days and shit, but it does seem to help me put things into perspective and what not. Granted this isn't going to calm me down or anything more than likely. But it's day 2, out of a year. I mean, a year is a long time, but yet anymore it feels so small. Like, it's already may. Where the fuck is the year going? It's frighteningly fast. A year is still a pretty long time though. And it's only day 2. But obviously there has to be an adjustment period. Getting used to things, figuring out new patterns. I dunno, at least my room is almost done. I guess. I keep putting all this pressure almost, on that having my own room will make things better. I'm sure it'll definitely improve things. I'll have my own space, my own room to be proud of and make all pretty. And it's in the basement, away from everyone else. So once it's all set up and awesome, we could probably hang out there. Idk, it really makes me feel backwards to hang out in my room at my parents house, but oh well I guess. Whatever works is gonna be what happens. Cuz I don't really know how things are gonna go with us now. You still say we will hang out soon, and I hope that holds true because I'd really like that. We haven't really gotten a chance to just hang out in a pretty long time. Anymore I'm kinda thinking of moving out next spring. Because also, at this point, I feel like I need to live here for quite a while, because of my room here. It was more or less designed specifically for me so I figure I should live in it for at least about a year. Plus then I'll be coming up on (hopefully) my senior year at school. I want to live on my own I've realized. But the situations aren't right for it. I need to start saving my money again, instead of blowing it all on clothes and food. And like I said, I feel like I've got to stay here for a while now. And I'm sure I'm gonna love my room so that'll be nice. I feel like next spring it'll be a lot more realistic for me to move back out. I dunno, I'm also not opposed to living with someone. Hint hint wink wink. For reals, I'm not gonna hold my breath or plan on it in any way, but if by next spring, things with Miranda didn't really work, I'm guessing I'll still be down to live with you.
Im gonna end this with this: obviously a lot can happen in the next year, but IF situations are right, let's live together?
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