When morning comes

I really hope things are at least a little better tomorrow. I really hope I didn't completely fuck those thoughts up. It was great to hear you had been thinking them... I had been thinking a bit about living with you next year too. Enough that I was going to probably ask you soon about what you would think about that. I know this is a pretty big deal and can't just be brushed aside. I just want to bring up that night you threw up. You lied to me and said you were okay and didn't puke. I'm sure you just didn't want me worrying about you. You ended up telling me the truth. I don't think that this is so different from that. I mean I would say my lie was worse but I didn't want you worrying about me and I told you the truth. ...I'm even more sure than before that you are what I want. I don't even want to think about what would happen to me if I just wrecked everything. I just need to try to stay positive that we will get through this. I believe we can, but it up to you, not me. We are so much stronger than one stupid, good intentioned but still stupid, poorly timed lie. You mean so much to me. ...maybe we can go back to being great soonish, once this has been processed. I could be great with us now but it up to you. Find out more in the morning once things have settled in more.